my mind says something that my body doesn't hear
its like trying to talk to a deaf ear
without the knowledge of sign
its ridiculous
but its all the time and there is nothing i can do about it

my open mind isn't connected to an open body

a body that doesn't see space or time or care about theology
it doesn't know me

its a walking
talking
eating
robot man leading itself to destruction down
it
falls willing and ready to die

all the while my mind soars through possibilities
and through bended knees it makes everything out of life
it is the destruction of pride
coming from the inside
letting the high tide roll it over on its back
and in feeling this i'm taken aback to the beginning
because

my mind says something my body doesn't hear
its unfortunate, uncaring, deceiving, blind, useless
deaf ear doesn't hear


all because it doesn't care
it doesn't pay for the local bus ride
it doesn't smile it runs and hides



and i wonder why i am who i am
an outspoken man
not willing or ready to take life by the hands

BUT
I will defeat it
i'll make it cry
this stupid robot i won't let die
and when all the others run of that cliff
i'll be found setting in the midst............................. of chaos
with book and pen
writing down that moment so it won't happen again
i'm changing history
i have no doubt
so open your mind and let out a shout
see life as its supposed to be
glory filled and on our knees

Hey guys, I haven't been to xanga in a long time due to many different things.... Life has been crazy and many things have been advancing lately. Including plans for the near and distant future....

I've been thinking a lot lately about fear and how the greatest fear, for most, is death. Although with my views in life and about it I don't think death is the scariest thing out there.... So this is my heart.... on some 1's and 0's... =)



we live this life
with full intention to die
trying with every breath to feel alive
yet no one sees beyond their dreams
or grasps their ability to be free
We all have friends or foe
pulling us down
saying this is who you are
and chains hold tight
to the things inside
just emphasizing the reason we die

Were all spinning in circles
around and around
beat after beat
our eyes staring down
till nothing is left
we move no more
and rot on an everlasting floor

Freedom from death is a reasonable truth
we all can have yet no one moves
to whats sitting there before our eyes
its like were just here to die

Well I'm not a usual friend or foe
who drags you down into a hole
so hold up your head and see the light
you can't fear death when its full of life.




its also a song... lol

its been a while since i've hit up the xanga scene... guess i'm back haha

I've been perplexed lately on how much people actually don't care. It's like there fighting desire to be cool in which I really don't understand.  It seems as though some person told everyone else that if your layed back and don't care about anything your the coolest person ever. It's not like i have anything against a whole bunch of Fonzie's running around but at least in a round about sorta way Fonzie himself even did work.

Now this small rant isn't about someone not putting forth any effort "doing work" but someone who actually thinks it is cool to under perform. Now if you did know me you would know that relaxing just isn't something i'm really into. I love to be up and running all the time and end up getting screwed from it (physical injury or illness) quite often. In saying that there is just no way i could ever understand being lazy for fun or even outside reasons. Beit being cool or anything of the sort.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not God and i do feel tired(now not very much just because of my fascination with coffee) and during those times i rest. I'm just to hyper a person not to move lol... and if i'm going to stop doing something in opposition of it i'm not going to stop doing everything. I'll find something else....:)